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"Bro," he urged, holding up his hand and silencing me, "you're jumping all over the spectrum here! Slow down! I appreciate you trying to hand me a little slice of nirvana, but you're not making a whole lot of sense! Let's start at the beginning. What are these "tests" that you've flunked?"I leaned back and took another swig of beer before explaining. "They're called 'Tumor Marker Tests, ' and there are several types of them. They're blood tests. One was a PSA, the standard test for prostate problems ... and it can be high for a lot of reasons, not just cancer. The other is called an AFP ... I'm not going to get into technical names for these ... and it tests for liver cancer and a couple other things. It doesn't mean anything dire at this point. They'll retest again in a month, since both are notorious for false positives. And we're still a long way from determining anything, anyway ... there would be biopsies, scans and other tests first." But you think maybe the bone marrow. The purse skidded across the sidewalk.I reached down to retrieve it, and felt a sharp sensation in my arm.One of the other little bastards had stabbed me.Now, normally I probably would have passed out; but my earlier anger (and the attendant adrenaline rush) transformed me, and by this time I was so enraged, I turned and brought my briefcase up in a softball pitch, catching him under the chin. A couple of teeth flew out, and he went down in a heap.The first kid got up and ran, the third kept boogying, and the second, the one I'd hit, staggered to his feet, used some vile language, and then collapsed again.A police officer arrived at that moment and cuffed the little bastard; his partner grabbed me, sat me down, and said, "Hey pal, take it easy, we've got an ambulance on the way."I was confused, until I started getting dizzy. I looked at my arm, where I'd been stabbed, and I was bleeding impressively. The rescue squad showed up, bandaged my arm, and insisted on taking me to the.
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