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I knew it was for me, because there was one of those photographs on it. Of me. In the skirt. Oh, God. I grabbed the picture and stuffed it in my backpack before sitting on the edge of the bed, and wondering if I could really go through with it. A part of me wanted to. Another part was horrified. What if someone should come in and discover me? What if this was all a trick, designed to embarrass me? In the end, I decided to try to divorce myself from all my doubts, and just think about what the note had said, and how it made me feel. I stood, just barely sure enough to continue, and pulled my shirt over my head. Jeans were next, and I stood there in bra and panties, still not certain. I realised then that I had some leeway within the instructions, and turned back to the bed, planning to lift the covers, and climb underneath. I needn’t have bothered. The bed was really just a bare imitation, built for some no-doubt badly envisaged play at some point, and the covers were permanently. When I handed Jay his beer he said, “Thank you,” and then started to cry softly. Seth and I both put our arms around him and let him know that whatever had happened he was still the person we had known before Spring Break. Seth asked if he should leave, and Jay shook his head no. Finally, he stopped crying and looked at me. “Remember what I told you about Janice and Drew?” I nodded. “Well, I saw Garrett over Spring Break. It happened again.” I took Jay in my arms and just held him. “It doesn’t matter, Jay. Nothing you do will matter to how I feel about you. Do you want to talk about it now?” Jay told us the story. Garrett had gone to a state university and was home at the same time Jay was. Over the weekend, Garrett’s parents were out of town and he invited Jay over for a few beers. They sat bullshitting and drinking beer, and then Garrett suggested a game of pool. They’d had a six-pack between them by then, and continued drinking while playing. Somebody suggested strip pool and soon.
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