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He's got condoms. I'm on the pill. And I have determined that my virginity belongs to the guy I love.Friday. I'm home. Four-thirty. No Ed. He never works past four. Text. 'Where are u?" Work. Call u in a bit."Where's my Ed?He says he's going to call. He calls. "Hi, my Dana," he said."Ed, where are you?" I'm at work. We had a little fire in the server room. My whole plant network's down." That sounds really bad." It's like the apocalypse for an IT guy. We have to get everything in here restored. We lost servers. Drives. Routers. Cables. That whole schmeer." Are you coming home soon?" Probably not until later. Pretty late. I'm a mess. I'm full of soot and burnt plastic and stuff. I have to get this old stuff pulled out so we can start the repairs." Gee," I said. I wanted to say 'baby', but I caught myself before I did. Gramma was sitting across the living room from me. "I guess I need to go take care of DC, huh?" Yeah, punkin," he said. I know he's soft-pedaling too. Probably got. .. The neighbors are pissed because we were banging the wall..." What's he got?" Well, I'm always blindfolded ... It's about this long and thick -- and circumcized. Yummy!" I stifled a chuckle at Crystal's description."Damn. Will he share?" I don't know ... Besides, he might be the one. In fact, I'm sure of it!" Crystal, you don't know the guy's NAME!" Desiree erupted."He's gonna tell me..." Yeah, the night he decides to slit your throat! 'Oh, by the way, my name is Slasher... ' What are you thinking?" I'm thinking I survived this long," Crystal replied, softly. "I'm in for the long haul." Yeah, right. 'I now pronounce you Anonymous Molester and Wife. You may kiss the bride.' You are WHACKED!" Desiree insisted."That's why you can't meet him," Crystal retorted, "I don't see you ever trusting him -- or vice-versa." That's because I have good sense!" I chuckled to myself again and dug out my pad of sticky notes and wrote, "Listen to Desiree -- she has good sense! No, on second thought,.
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