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I pushed open the spring loaded entrance door. The place was empty, except for the bartender and an older gentleman in a grey trench coat, sitting at the end of the bar. It was a typical barroom that was sporadically decorated with Christmas lights and a fake tree in the corner. The jukebox was belting out Bing Crosby’s “White Christmas.” I stomped my boots to knock off the snow. "Come on in out of that cold,” said the bartender, wiping the counter. “What are you doing out on a night like this?” “To tell you the truth, I really could use a drink. What can I get for…”—I reached in my pocket and pulled out some waded bills—“… Six dollars and forty three cents?” “Put your money away. Drinks are on the house tonight!” He replied with a smile. “After all, it's Christmas Eve! What would you like?” “I really haven't thought that far ahead,” I said. “Something strong, I suppose.” I peeled off my parka and hung it on the coat rack along with my stocking hat. Before I climbed on the. But if you cum before either one of us... we get the apartment... AND your mattresses."Joey excitedly gestured his approval. "Ooo, ooo, that's good. Their beds are soft... and they smell good, too... like Rach and Monica's perfume and stuff." DEAL!" Monica voiced her enthusiastic agreement, then jabbed her finger alternately at the two. "You are SO gonna lose this bet. I RULE at giving blowjobs! In fact, I'm the Blowjob Queen." Interesting," Chandler deadpanned. "I thought that my father was awarded that title. Fortunately, I was never invited to the coronation..." Okay, I'll go get a condom," Joey said, heading toward his room."Oh no, you don't, mister," Monica objected. "I know what condoms do for guys."He stopped, uncertain of her meaning, and offered, "They... keep us from getting women pregnant?" Well, that too," she conceded. "But when you're wearing a condom, you don't FEEL as much, so you don't CUM as fast. No siree. No condom. I'll go put in my diaphragm." She turned to.
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