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Like I said, paradise."There you are," said Tim. "Valley Farm." Great," I said, "but how the hell can we afford this, it's gotta be way over our budget." Don't be too sure," Tim, the agent said. "Wait until you've seen it all and then we'll discuss it."We commence the tour. There was certainly plenty of accommodation, although you tended to go through one room to get to another, and the place was habitable; just. The kitchen was rudimentary by modern standards and the bathroom was, um ... let's just say the first thing that would happen would be total replacement whilst we used my old caravan. There was an electricity supply, although the wiring in the house looked distinctly unsafe, and a telephone connection arrived on the same poles, and yes a reasonable broadband connection was available. Altogether there were nine rooms on the ground floor, although one or two were small, and there was a large entrance hall with a staircase to two further rooms on the first floor. Outside the. There was a young woman in deeWho stayed with each man she did see.When it came to a testShe wished to be best,And practice makes perfect, you see.There was a young fello of kentWhose prick was so long that it bent,So to save himself troubleHe put it in double,And instead of coming, he went.There was a young man of kildaireWho was fucking a girl on the stair.The bannister broke,But he doubled his strokeAnd finished her off in mid-air.There was a young girl from new yorkWho plugged up her cunt with a cork.A woodpecker or twoMade the grade, it is true,But it totally baffled the stork.Till along came a man who presentedA tool that was strangely indented.With a dizzying twirlHe punctured that girl,And thus was the corkscrew invented.There was a young lady of norwayWho hung by her heels in a doorway.She said to her beau,‘Look at me, joe,I think i’ve discovered one more way.’There once was a lady from ardenWho sucked off a man in a garden.He said, ‘my dear flo,Where does all that stuff.
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