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Tonight, here for the first time in over three years, ladies and gentlemen, They Only Look Dead.” Part of the crowd gasped in remembrance.“I guess that is my cue! Go and sit and relax and get me an ice tea, I am going to need my throat wet.”“Me to, but that is later.” Erin smiled and she and Lynn were directed to the front tables by Lester. I walked up to the mic and called out our normal opening song, an original song, from the ‘old’ days. I counted it out and off we went. The crowd went nuts as they realized who I was. In the ‘old’ days I was pushing 400 pounds and had a long dirty Fu Manchu moustache. But the voice was still there and the first note out of my mouth brought down the house.We finished the first song and as the crowd went nuts, I smiled and shook hands with the guys and fist bumped the drummer. The next song was a medley of “Keep Your Hands To Yourself” by the Black Crowes and “Bang A Gong” by T-Rex. At the end we got the audience singing along and then had some fun. From the forests full of slender elf maidens, to the beds of seductive succubi and ponds of mermaids with the thickest hips you could imagine boy." Mermaids don't have a pussy. Their bottom halves are fish." Your brother points out."They have mouths!" You scream at him. "and breasts you could squeeze together should the need arise." Why can't you just meet a nice girl here?" Your sister pleads." They've all turned me down already-and that's not the point! I've no interest in simple farm girls when a world of possibilities awaits me!"After a bit more back and forth with your family, you finally set off on the small dirt road to the city. You ride your trusty burro, Reuben for hours before you connect onto the Imperial road where you stop to have a small lunch of cheese and fruit. You nearly choke on a peach pit but a strike of Reuben's foot on your back sends the pit bouncing down the cobblestone road. Another half day's travel and you arrive in the city. A helpful guard directs you.
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