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"I'm interested in dancing with you." Oh," she said. If she'd been denying what she had to know about my interest in her, she couldn't deny it any more. "Um, sweetie, I'm not--" Don't say what you are or what you aren't," I said. "That's how people try to define you. They've defined you in lots of ways, haven't they, Beth? By your size. 'She has a good personality.' 'Makes a great bridesmaid.' Always in terms of how men look at you. Well, maybe I look at you a whole different way. Beautiful. Strong. Alluring. Independent. Maybe in a place like Vegas, you can be those things, and anything else you want to be, free of their definitions. You can experiment as much as you'd like, and when you go home no one has to know but you." I stood up. "And if all you want to do is dance, all you have to do is dance and we'll have a lot better time together than if we both spent the rest of the night feeding quarters into video poker. So, Beth, wanna go dancing?"She thought for a moment. "Okay," she. I watched as she got home from work this evening. I was surprised when she walked across the street, up my driveway and knocked on the door. I opened the door, she looked at me and said “I just got home, and I have this strong urge to have a good time, dance, get drunk, and have sex tonight. Are you doing anything?” I quickly replied “Nope, I’m free!” “Great” she said. “Can you watch my dog?”I’m seriously thinking about re-marrying my ex-wife ... but I’m pretty sure she’ll figure out I’m just after my money.A 13 year old weasel walks into a bar and approaches the counter. The bartender immediately notices the underage weasel. “Sir, you look extremely young. I can’t serve you even a single beer”. “Oh c’mon. You can’t just slide me one?” “Can’t and will not serve to anyone under age”. “Fine. Well what other things do you have?” “Well for non-alcoholic drinks I have tap water and bottled water, I have coffee, and I have pop. Which would you like?” “Pop” goes the weasel.Three desperately.
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