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8) There are more varieties of chocolate. M&M’s figured out that we love variety, blue even. It would be so easy to go a whole year, eating a different chocolate daily. Don’t, though. Kama Sutra has 27 positions, but half appear to be exceedingly uncomfortable, positively injurious.9) Having chocolate with children is legal. We’re bumped in the stairwells by boys bigger than we are. “Oh, sorry, Ms. Barton,” them scoring a feel.Any boy whose desk I bend over can see down my neckline. Any male teacher who bends over a girl’s desk sees down hers. But as we eliminated having chocolate on the teacher’s desk in (4), what’s the tie between subsequently mentoring a younger friend and chocolate?The answer: chocolate-coated mints. What do we see at the checkout? Junior Mints. How do we support the Girl Scouts? Thin Mints keep us thin. A chocolate mint reminds us of a nubile body.“Mr. Gibson, I know I didn’t do that well on the Algebra test, but wanna’ buy some Girl Scout Cookies?”“Sure,. The more he frowned, the more nervous Igot."Who dressed you? Your grannie? I never seen a girl dressed so old.You wanna' marry my brother, you got to get with the program, bitch.Lotsa style. Classica, comprende? You got that?" I nodded but Consuelawas up and behind me. Without warning, she had my hair in her fist andwas dragging me out the patio doors to the pool. She threw me in. Icrawled out, my hair and clothes ruined, make-up running down my face."Strip to your panties, Cha-Cha." No one knew Raoul called me that, orat least I had thought so. But clearly not any more. I pulled the wetclothes off and stood shivering, nearly nude. "Don't know what you see in the bitch, big brother. Tiny tits, a flatass, no figure." I tried to cover myself with my hands to avoid herinspection but Consuela slapped them away. "Got no style. Standingthere like a wet rag. I'm telling you, this bitch ain't worth thetrouble."Raoul stood up and circled where I stood. "Maybe you could give.
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