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"WHAT!!??" their mother yelled. She immediately stood up and kicked her underwear off her feet, she didn't care about the fact that she was now completely bottomless in front of her kids. She ran to the hallway to see what was going on. She ran back to them, "Ok we'll have to jump out the bathroom window, but first have either of you gotten burned?" she said. "I have" Jessica said. Their mother looked at it, pulled her over to the sink, lifted her burned leg over the counter, and started to run water over it. As she was tending to Jessica's wound, Peter couldn't help but look at his mother's butt and vagina as they were fully exposed, he all of a sudden looked out the window they were supposed to jump out of and saw large flames right outside, that entire side of the house was already on fire. "Uhmm, we've got a problem" Peter said. His mother rushed over and saw it, "Oh fuck" she said. Jessica saw it too and started freaking out, "oh God we're all going to burn alive" she whined.. . ✧ ✧ ✧If 2020 was a math word-problem: If you’re going down a river at 2 MPH andyour canoe loses a wheel, how much pancake mix would you need to re-shingleyour roof?✧ ✧ ✧I see people about my age mountain climbing; I feel good getting my legthrough my underwear without losing my balance.✧ ✧ ✧We can all agree that in 2015 not a single person got the answer correctto, “Where do you see yourself 5 years from now?”✧ ✧ ✧So if a cow doesn’t produce milk, is it a milk dud or an udder failure?✧ ✧ ✧If you can’t think of a word say “I forgot the English word for it.” Thatway people will think you’re bilingual instead of an idiot.✧ ✧ ✧I’m at a place in my life where errands are starting to count as going out.✧ ✧ ✧Coronacoaster noun: the ups and downs of a pandemic. One day you’re lovingyour bubble, doing work outs, baking banana bread and going for long walksand the next you’re crying, drinking gin for breakfast and missing peopleyou don’t even like.✧ ✧ ✧I’m at that age where my mind still.
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