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Still fucking shaking from nervousness.He was gonna text me when he got there, so I sat down on the couch to get ready mentally. I don’t drink or do d**gs, so that wasn’t an option… Instead I put on a bunch of sissy hypno and put my buttplug in my ass. My idea was that he would get turned on by the buttplug when I was sucking his dick, I wasn’t actually getting my ass ready for getting fucked (at least I didn’t think I was). I have absolutely no idea how long I watched that stuff, but it must have been a while. I was really trying to turn my brain into mush so I would be a good whore and not be so nervous about fucking up. My plan was that as soon as he would text I would get up and get on my knees in the middle of my living room floor, to greet him properly. My mind was a total mist at this point (unfortunately not from the hypno, but from nervousness. My legs were jelly and my body didn’t feel like my own).I got the text. I don’t remember what it said. I got up right away, barely. That’s why I was going to force it; tonight, by my own hand.Then, would you like to change the lives of those you hold dear?I hadn’t expected another message.The faces of the two women I lived with—my aunt and my younger sister—surfaced momentarily from the depths of my selfishness, but I closed my eyes to them.Aunt Riley was getting by just fine without my help, and Jessie—You’re running away from it.—was better off without a useless brother like me. I selected “no” again.There was no third prompt.Since I didn’t have anywhere in particular to go, I walked aimlessly around my small coastal Florida town of Navarre taking pictures of whatever happened to catch my attention. I’d like to say they were the best pictures I’d ever taken. To say that before my death a miracle occurred and I captured my last will and testament in photographic form.If miracles like that really occurred, maybe I wouldn’t have felt like running away.No, the pictures I took were as average as any other I’d taken..
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