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"He doesn't know." A croak from the room she'd just left. "Henry expects- expected me in the bedroom." Simon peered at her from the doorway. "He'll come here when he notices Seven isn't there." Here?" He knows we talk. Sometimes." The older boy glanced at his copy. "He didn't like it. But he liked punishing us."'The man has entered the front door, dear, ' said Matthias.Renee shut her eyes tight, trying to block out the Shitshitshit- running through her head. Think!The hall was too narrow for any furniture, nothing for her to hide behind. It met the larger corridor that Henry would come from ... but she couldn't wait at that corner, because then Simon wouldn't see.Hiding in Simon's room was almost a good idea, but too much could go wrong. Henry would see the open door; he'd either turn the lights on inside the chamber and reveal her - or she could have Matthias refuse his command, and lose the element of surprise."Fuck," she whispered again. Renee turned to the kid. "Go over there,". .. and permanently. I no longer cared about thecomplexity or the risks of the surgery. I just wanted that stuff GONE,once and for all. I wanted a completely female body, and I didn't carewhat I had to do to get it.Okay, it's probably an exaggeration to say that I no longer cared. Istill carried a lot of anxiety about it, but the thing is, that anxietywas no longer a block. I was finally ready, and from here on out, Iwasn't going to let anything stop me.Where I live (Canada), we are extremely fortunate that SRS is covered byour public health insurance, but, in order to QUALIFY for coverage, thereare about a thousand hoops you have to jump through first. And I was onlypoised for hoop number one. I had a long way to go.Hoop number one was simply to get a foot in the door of the Adult GenderIdentity Clinic at CAMH in Toronto, which at the time was the onlyfacility in the country authorized to recommend approvals for surgery.The waiting time: ten months. Ten fucking months. Gads.(Even then.
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