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He toyed with the chain that connected the clamps and I was his. I should probably state that I had never done anything even remotely like this before, all of my toys had been used by myself in the privacy of my own home. I'm not a virgin but,up until this point, I had led the most repressed, vanilla life you could imagine. I look very all American, rosy cheeks, big eyes, nice skin - I look very respectable but underneath there's always been a deep need to be dominated and to be entirely submissive, a need that hasn't been met. I've always had a desire to be a slut for one man too, to explore and be explored, to be shared by him if it's his desire but to be his toy, his slut, his submissive, his partner. I've never found the right man to even discuss it with but this man held great promise. He stood behind me and played with my nipples and the clamps, but when he sucked on my neck and shoulders I felt it all the way down and I shivered with pleasure - my neck, shoulders and back are. Thoughts I had no way to express. I’d never had a girlfriend, or even a real kiss.I chewed my waffle slowly, then took a sip from my water glass, and then one from my glass of grapefruit juice.“I guess it’s just that things changed yesterday, after graduation.”True as far as it went, but not the whole truth.“I know it’s a cliché,” my mom said, “but today is the first day of the rest of your life. One Summer left, and then you’re off to college, medical school, and then you’ll be a doctor! It’s tough to leave your friends, especially ones you’ve known as long as you’ve known Dale and Jocelyn, and as close as the three of you are. But you’ll make new friends. And you have April!”I only WISH I ‘had’ April, I thought, then reproved myself because I was doing exactly what Jocelyn had said - thinking about sex all the time. And that was, I realized, the source of the problem. I wanted to kiss Jocelyn. No, actually, I wanted more than that, but even a kiss, an acknowledgment of my feelings.
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