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I cooled down and started thinking about geography, ever lasting drought before P.E. It was a strange new world this of mine, I had always been told men are to like girls yet, they never really appealed to me. Now on Christmas and whenever I saw my family the usual question of if I already had a girlfriend would swamp me like a tidal wave. I could never tell an almost Amish family that I was very, very fond of men.Back to the present the bell rang and I bolted out and straight to the teacher's lounge, he wasn't there, so I went to his office, he was in. I knocked, and every knock sounded like my heart was going to explode-Yes?-It's Martin, sir, I need to ask you something- he opened the door, his shirt was no on and his nipples were steel hard. I was hypnotized by those guns and when he noticed he smiled in a much cute way,-Do you like them-and he reached for his crotch -Come in.-I went, like sleep-walking.-What is it you needed from me?-A...a...a... swimsuit, I forgot mine at home,. . so, at least I got home OK.The wife's back on the warpath again.She was up for making a home video last night and all I did was suggest we should hold auditions for her part.Angela Merkel arrives at Passport Control in Athens airport."Nationality?" asks the immigration officer."German," she replies."Occupation?"No, just here for a few days."As the coffin was being lowered into the ground at a Parking Officer's funeral, a voice from inside screams:"I'm not dead, I'm not dead. Let me out!"The Vicar smiles, leans forward, sucking air through his teeth and mutters,"Too late, mate, the paperwork's already done."I spent a couple of hours defrosting the fridge last night.Or "foreplay" as she likes to call it.After both suffering from depression for a while, me and the missus were going to commit suicide together yesterday.Strangely enough, however, once she killed herself I started to feel a lot better.So I thought - sod it, I'll soldier on.I woke up this morning at 8 and could sense.
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