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I sort out all my clothes into ones that fit me now, ones that are just a bit tight and those I can't get into anymore. My goal is to get into those white Jeans and tank top at the end of the rail, the ones I wore on that great holiday I had with Paul; thinking of Paul brought a tear to my eyes.Its payday, almost a month since I started this bloody diet. After a long soak in the bath, I stood in front of my mirror, knowing that my clothes are definitely looser now than they were. I look critically at myself, out comes the tape measure, pull it tight, right, bust 42 waist 36 and hips 46. Great that inches off all round. Time to try on some of my old clothes. I find an older bra, that fits ok, but try as I might I can't find any knickers to fit. Ok new knicks tomorrow. Now that tight dress, yes still a bit tight but it fits much better now. I buy six pairs of new knickers and carry on with my regime. Although I'm now wearing different clothes, no one seems to notices my weight loss,. And I was desperate for a friend. He was two years ahead of me and would often talk in circles – or at least it sounded like that. He was studying history and was brilliant to listen to. We struck up a fast friendship and quickly became inseparable. It wasn’t a “love connection” really. I preferred a different kind of man. But as a friend, he was closer to me than almost anyone. We studied together, hung out together, laughed together. We talked about everything.We were at his apartment and the movie we were watching had long ended. Our conversation had meandered through the usual gripes and gossip and had settled on past relationships. Neither of us had much experience with relationships and we ended up laughing at our “sad” list of conquests. I hadn’t opened up about my past and really couldn’t explain to him that my only relationship was with a very controlling dad who didn’t let me date. I did have a boyfriend or two that my dad never found out about, but I had to be so careful.
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