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Or perhaps you don't,perhaps I should explain myself.I was an only child and I had a strong overbearing and ratherdisciplinarian father who I lived in fear of for much of my childhood. Healways used to to tell me what to do and how to behave and it was notalways obvious to me which meant I often felt a sense of paralysis, of notknowing what was expected of me or what I should say or do.I don't know quite when or how it happened now but I got to a stage in mylife when, after I had grown up and left home, I was going to go to a pubin the town where I lived which was known for "exotic dancers." It wasn'tthe first time I had been there nor was it the first time I found myselfhaving an internal argument with my Dad."A man of your age, with a hard working girlfriend like yours, doesn't goto places like that," my Dad said."But that's just where I met Liberty!" I replied.Then suddenly the ridiculousness of this hit me. I must have been about35 years old. And by ridiculousness I did not. She was right, I supposed. It could have been a lotworse. It was better to be her kid sister than a known sex criminal, thatwas for certain. And it was far better to be her kid sister than to be astripper down at Girlville like the Swensons. Even though I couldn'tremember them, I pitied them - doomed to be strippers and horny sluts forthe rest of their lives. Did they know who they had been? I assumed theydid. That made it all the worse.At least I knew Jenny's parents and had always liked them. I was sorry tohear her real sister's death had hurt their relationship so badly. Itgave me a little peace of mind to realize that by becoming Meg, I mightbe helping them.I looked at myself in the mirror again. Well, if I had to be a girl, itwas better to be a cute one. Still, those slender arms and small handswould never catch a pass again. The only passes I was going to catch werethe kind I didn't want. Okay, so I wasn't going to be much of an athlete.I had always been a good student, and.
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