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I was silent and let him hold me. It seemed to last for a long time and I must have been tense because he reached up to my head and lent it against his chest. I didn't resist. I felt powerless to resist and I knew that I didn't want to resist. I was glad to feel powerless as it stopped me feeling guilty (though obviously those thought weren't consciously thought at the time). Anyway it worked. With my head against his chest I felt myself exhale and relax and I felt comfortable and safe. He sensed it and I felt him sense it as he relaxed too and I lay against him like that for some time. Looking back those minutes spent in my imagination were the most sexually charged of all as I felt comfortable enough to be fully aware of what was happening. I was being touched by my Grandfather and no-one must ever no. I was fully aware that this was a secret forever between us. Perhaps he knew I knew that as he never told me to keep it secret. That was the kind of respect he gave me that made me. It was our last family trip before my dad died. I closed my eyes briefly, shaking my head, no bad thoughts. No sad memories. ‘Can I have the window seat?’ I looked at him over my shoulder as we walked through the aisle. He looked at me and squeezed my hand gently. ‘You can have anything you want,’ he grinned before kissing the top of my head. I spotted our seats and pulled him with me as I hurried to the two seats just for us. ‘Someone is excited.’ He smiled at me when I sat in the seat by the window, practically jumping up and down like a kid. ‘Why shouldn’t I be? We’re on our way to New York, together with no one to bother us, judge us. This is perfect.’ He stood in the aisle, putting our bags in the overhead compartment, staring at me. ‘You’re so cute,’ he grinned. ‘Cute how? Like I want to pinch your cheeks cute?’ I pouted, sitting on my knees with my arms crossed. He closed the compartment door and sat down next to me. He leaned in closer, his face close to my ear and.
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