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My tummy hurts when I sit up, and it's not the only bit of me that's sore. I think I'm going to be covered in bruises!"She was! On the Wednesday afternoon, when our downstairs neighbours were out in their tracksuits, Vee took Julie and I down to the half-landing bathroom to show us her bumps and bruises. They were turning quite colourful, and we almost felt guilty at the clusters of blotches around her nipples, on her tummy, and around the top of her thighs. Naturally, we offered to kiss her better, one thing led to another, and I ended up fucking Vee on the cast iron radiator again. Julie demanded her turn when we had finished, and after a few minutes I was able to persuade Gustav to give an encore.After our sports afternoon physical activities, it seemed very sensible to have a bath together, which was great fun. I was worried that the soft cotton flannel might irritate the girls' boobs, so I washed them gently with soapy hands. They seemed to appreciate my thoughtfulness...The. . You deserve to chuckle at the very least once.Why isn't the number 11 pronounced onety-one?If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhea ... does that mean that one out of five enjoys it?Why do croutons come in airtight packages? Aren't they just stale bread to begin with?If people from Poland are called Poles, then why aren't people from Holland called Holes?If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist, but a person who drives a race car is not called a racist?If it's true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are the others here for?If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, then doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked, and dry cleaners depressed?Do Lipton Tea employees take 'coffee breaks?'What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of bald men?I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons.
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