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”One day I entered Sex in a contest but before the competition began, the dog ran away. Another contestant asked me why I was just standing there looking around. I told him I had planned to have Sex in the contest. He told me that I should have sold tickets. “But you don’t understand,” I said. “I had hoped to have Sex on TV.” He called me a show-off.When my wife and I separated, we went to court to fight for custody of the dog. I said, “Your Honor, I had Sex before I was married.” The judge said, “Me too.” Then I told him that after I was married, Sex left me. He said, “Me too.”Last night, Sex ran off again. I spent hours looking around town for him. A cop came over to me and asked, “What are you doing in this alley at 4 o’clock in the morning?” I said, “I’m looking for Sex.”My case comes up Friday.✧ ✧ ✧From the telephoneman i asked the doctor who I should get to help me get fit again, “Physiologist, physiotherapist, personal trainer?”After examining me he just said, “Necromancer!”✧ ✧. Neither of us were interested in anything athletic so we talked or studied together, sometimes talking about church because we had the same youth pastor, his older brother.Daniel wore a ring, too, symbolizing his oath to wait until marriage. I planned on bringing that up today.We always sat at the top of the bleachers and he was already there waiting on me to join him. I ran up and sat down. He noticed a glimmer in my eyes."What's with you today?" he asked, laughing."What do you mean?" I asked, attempting to and hoping to succeed in flirting with him with my eyes."I don't know. You look....different. Happy."Did I usually look sad?I laughed casually.How did I approach this?"So, true love waits. What do you think about that?"This caught him off guard and his face reddened. "Well," he paused, "I didn't expect that." We both laughed. "I suppose it is just important to wait until you are married and in a commited relationship." I don't want to wait," I blurted.His eyes shifted quickly..
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