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“I keep seeing these,” he said. “What are they?”“Oh, those!” Alice blushed as she realised what he held in his hand. “They’re just poems. We thought it’d be something different for the guests to have fun with. You know - little mementos they could take away afterwards. I guess they weren’t interested in them.”Ciaran unfolded the paper, grinning as he read the stanza.“The lads an lasses toy an kiss,the lads ne’er think it is amiss;to bang the holes whereout they piss –an that’s the reels o Bogie.”He gave a low whistle. “Bloody hell! It’s pretty raunchy stuff for a wedding, isn’t it?” he asked.“It’s literary, actually – from Robert Burns’ The Merry Muses of Caledonia. Turns out the man wrote about more than just haggis.” Alice sighed. “It was Mark’s idea, really. He’s a college professor and it’s the kind of academic conceit that appeals to him.”She brushed a stray lock of auburn hair away from her eyes and turned, taking two steps before looking down at the floor.“Damn it,”. ." she hesitated. "Will you promise not to be mad?"I thought about it. How could my dear, sweet Connie do anything that would make me mad? But still, I'm cautious at heart. "Probably not." Oh," she said, looking uncomfortable. Then she took a breath. "I'm pregnant!"My heart started racing. She'd been untrue! She'd let some foul male of her kind get into her. Even if it was just one little squirt, he had accomplished what my body was instinctively but vainly trying to do with such passion several times each day.My dear, sweet Connie had done something to make me angry -- very angry."But..." I sputtered. "I thought you'd never seen a gurley man!" Oh, no, I haven't!" Then how did it happen?" I sneered, quivering with rage. "Did he just happen to take you from behind when you weren't looking?" No! You're the father!" Me?" My rage collapsed into roiling confusion."Well, you have been, um, fertilizing me pretty much."That was an understatement. Confusion was replaced by excitement realizing.
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