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Pulling me into her arms and rocking me as if I was still a young boy."Shhhhh, it's okay Jake, you're at home now. It's just a dream, Shhh." No mom, that's just it", I sobbed "It's not just a dream, it's a fucking memory!" I know Jacob, I know" she soothed, still rocking.After I calmed a bit mother released me. "Jake honey, I will go get you a glass of water and one of your pills. I'll be right back sweety."I watched my mother's slim form walked walk out the door as she headed downstairs to the kitchen, while I rocked back and forth on the edge of my bed. I couldn't stop shaking, I was a fucking basket case and I knew it, but knowing and being able to do something about it were two totally different things. That all expenses paid trip to Baghdad that ol' Dubyah had sent me on really had made a lasting impression. No need for vacation photos, I would carry the pictures in my head for the rest of my life.I heard mother coming up the stairs and turned my head to watch her come in. She. I still hurt from what she did to us, but I’ve come to terms with it finally. It made it possible for me to find someone new and I am so happy to have Ellie in my life. I don’t think that would have been possible if I hadn’t gotten some help.’ Roger had finished his long narrative and stopped to see his son’s reaction. ‘So, are you saying you think I should see a Psychiatrist, dad?’ Steve asked carefully. ‘Dr. Weisman takes on private clients. I know him well enough to call him and talk to him and see what he suggests. I won’t do that without your agreement though.’ ‘Am I causing you problems, dad?’ he asked seriously. ‘Only that I’m worried about you. You’ve gone through a terrible time and it’s obviously weighing on you.’ he said seriously. ‘Look Steve, I was reluctant too, but I can tell you he helped me and if he can help you … well … why not try?’ ‘I’ll think about it dad, I promise … I’ll think about it.’ Steve replied. Nothing more was said about it that day or the following.
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