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He must have found something he didn’t like, because the moment he touched her there, he stopped and drew away. She didn’t know whether to feel relieved or humiliated. She couldn’t get a good look at his face to get a sense of what had happened, or what would happen next. He hadn’t killed her, and again, she had some very complicated emotions over this, because the knife and the pain it had caused was ever on her mind. It goes without saying that her heart sank when she saw him return with yet another blade after leaving her alone for a couple of minutes. The knife looked smaller, and although she’d only gotten a quick glimpse, she felt panic swelling like a balloon inside her chest.She thought of ways to appeal to his mercy, at this point. Things she could say to get him to stop. Nothing logical came to mind, only a memory did whisper between her ears. A memory of her mother feeding her a strawberry, and telling her that ‘If you ever find yourself having words with someone who is. " No, she said you didn't. You took complete responsibility for not wanting to bother me. Jackie, do you think it bothers me to help out my child when he's in trouble or just needs a parent? Do you think that little of me as a mother?" Mom... I..." Jackie, I work as a nurse to pay for this house, buy food, pay for an old car, gas and insurance. But my job is being a mother to you and Mary. It hurts to have somebody who's only known you for 48 hours tell me that you've been hurting and were afraid to bother me by coming to me. I haven't been doing my job. How could you even think I didn't care for you?" Mom, I never thought you didn't care for us. That's why you work such long hours and are tired all the time. Part of my job is to make things as easy as I can and not bother you with a bunch of crap." It isn't crap when you're growing up and need help or guidance or even someone to talk to about what's been happening in your life. Jill told me you wouldn't discuss your school with her.
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