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I’m the monster. They shouldn’t love me. I don’t deserve it.” I clapped my hands over my mouth, shocked and horrified by what I’d just admitted. Is that really why I’ve been such a bitch since I woke up? Able to examine the thought consciously, finally, even I knew it was stupid when I thought about it.I’d been able to admit that I would have done the same in Faren’s place; I’d never blamed Nate for deciding to kill Kallian before they’d been rescued. I didn’t blame Zevran for being an assassin, Leli for being a bard...Perhaps I could learn to forgive myself for doing as Faren asked.It was a revelation. All of a sudden my anger made sense. Though it was unexpectedly, amazingly, almost gone; I still felt guilty, but somehow also better for getting the ridiculous truth out there.I was so caught up in my own sudden insight that I didn’t hear the doors open or the footsteps, and before I knew what was happening, I was being lifted into familiar arms, settled into a comfortable lap,. With every minute, the gentle tingle of the urge to pee quickly turnedto pain as I tried to hold it back.I knew I wouldn't be able to hold it much longer.He began moving his hips, sliding my mouth and up down, really fuckingmy mouth, using it as a warm slippery hole to stuff his cock in."This is what big girls do for their boyfriends. Do you like being a biggirl?" Ughhhh," I whimpered. "...but I haf to pee..." I mumbled around his movingshaft.I had been 4 or 5 the last time I had wet myself so twenty-five years ofcontrol and conditioning were hard to break. I tried to relax. I thoughtof how wonderful it would feel to completely let go, to let the littlegirl in the diaper take over.To enjoy the release.My cock softened slightly and then it started with a little squirt, Ijumped as I felt the heat splatter against me inside the diaper.I felt my eyelids flutter.He noticed my brief hesitation and his nostrils flared, growling, "Youbetter hold it. Don't you dare tinkle in your diaper. You.
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