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One day the tower received a call from an aircraft asking, “What time is it?”The tower responded, “Who is calling?”The aircraft replied, “What difference does it make?”The tower replied, “It makes a lot of difference ... If it is a commercial flight, it is 3 o’clock. If it is an Air Force plane, it is 1500 hours. If it is a Navy aircraft, it is 6 bells. If it is an Army aircraft, the big hand is on the 12 and the little hand is on the 3. If it is a Marine Corps aircraft, it’s Thursday afternoon and 120 minutes to “Happy Hour.”During training exercises, the lieutenant who was driving down a muddy back road encountered another car stuck in the mud with a red-faced colonel at the wheel. “Your jeep stuck, sir?” asked the lieutenant as he pulled alongside. “Nope,” replied the colonel, coming over and handing him the keys. “Yours is.”Having just moved into his new office, a pompous, new colonel was sitting at his desk when an airman knocked on the door. Conscious of his new position, the. "Alright, what's the question?" I asked her, unsure of what she may want to know about me.She pondered for a moment, and then asked away. "Okay, I have one. How many times do you jerk off in a day?" she said with a soft giggle of knowing I couldn't not answer.My jaw dropped, not expecting such a personal question so quickly. "Oh that's not fair." I called out."Remember. You accepted the rules and you have to answer truthfully and you can't not answer the question!" she said with a secretive smile."Okay, I guess a few, maybe four or five on most days I think. Like, first thing in the morning, last thing at night and a couple of times inbetween." I replied.We played another round, as she beat me again with an eight to my two. "You sure you haven't sorted these cards so you win all the time!" I asked with a smile."Haha, no. I know a good one. Have you ever caught anyone having sex?" she asked me."I almost caught my parents one time. I woke up one night and heard noises. I went and.
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