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"That's another thing. What do I look like? Some kind of Jackson Five reject?" The voice that emanated from the matted orange furball sitting on the fuzzy toilet seat was not feminine at all, but rather a deep masculine voice. "I ain't no... La Toya. That has got to be the stupidest name I ever heard for a cat. The name's Jasper. I'm a boy, in case you haven't noticed. See these?" He turned around, pointed his rear at the stunned Harriet and jiggled the two fuzzy testicles at her.She stared, open jawed at the speaking feline, not believing what was happening in front of her. "You... you're speaking... You can't do that, you're a cat. Cats don't speak, they meow."Jasper turned to face her. "Yeah, yeah. An' we're finicky, we don't dance, an jellacle cats come out at night. Meow. How's that?"Harriet quickly turned, yanked the white porcelain sink faucets on full blast and scrubbed her face vigorously, trying to wash away the disbelief. "This isn't happening. Cats don't talk. Cat's don't. So, over the course of time, i had become the one who would pick up people for school and take them home at night. Jennifer used to make fun of me for being everyone's "free taxi". Anyway, my last two stops of the day were to take her best friend (Becky) home, and then my girlfriend. I would usually hang out with Jennifer until 6:00 though since i had worked at the movie theater in town at that time. One particular day, i had noticed Jenn and Becky acting particularly "perky". Very hyper, and very touchy feely with each other in a joking kind of way. You must know though that the two of them have claimed in the past to have fooled around some, but i had always figured it was bull shit, and only their way of teasing me. After the first two stops, all that was left was me, Jennifer, and Becky. They were sitting in the back seat, FLASHING me in the rear view mirror. Apparently they enjoyed making me squirm.... and they knew i was getting a bit antsy in my seat. Jennifer was 5'4", 125.
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