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“I’ve heard all the puns.” “Right.” “Relax, Elliot! We’re old friends just catching up.” “Friends?” “Mm?” “We haven’t been…” Portia frowns. “Oh… right. That’s why I stole you from Ash.” “Thought you were just saving me from a loopy Ash-hole.” Her eyes roll, but lips curve. “Mm. Partly. But… ever have a memory from years and years ago suddenly slap you like a bag of dicks?” My choked laugh presses her on. “Seriously! I scrooged you when we were kids, El. Then in high school…” She looks innocent for a second. Guilty even. Not the look I’d associate with someone who loved fast cars, dangerously short skirts, and the entire football team if you believed rumors. “Ghost of future’s past can be a wicked whore,” she sighs, nibbling on a peppermint stick. “Tackle you outta nowhere. Buuut.” “But?” * “Fuckin’ A,” Portia moans as she washes down a puff of weed with a pull from a bottle of grey goose. “I’ve been Jonesing for this all day.” She passes them over. “Puff, puff,. Right?’ I stood up shaking my head. ‘No, I have to get back, they’ll be worried about me soon.’ ‘You’re really going to leave me with pedophiles creeping around.’ I shook my head at her again. ‘I really doubt, they’re pedophiles, Jessie. You said yourself, hunters come out here occasionally, maybe they got lost.’ ‘Without their guns, Devin?’ ‘Maybe they went to take a piss and didn’t want to shoot themselves in the ass.’ She just stared at me. ‘Was that supposed to be funny?’ ‘Yes . . .’ She shook her head. ‘It wasn’t.’ ‘Are you sure you aren’t just paranoid?’ In a voice filled with flatness she replied, ‘Yes, I’m paranoid. I don’t like old men running around the woods that surround my house.’ I sighed. I doubt she would let me leave. We hadn’t seen each other in, I don’t know how long, and now ‘old’ men are running around the woods she lives in. I pulled my cell from my pocket and called Maria. ‘Hey Maria? I just ran into an old friend and I’m going to spend the night with him..
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