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From then on we argued over every stupid thing. Either that or we ignored each other. By Easter, things were really bad, bordering on explosive.Now Amanda had a girlfriend, Dee, from her university days. She was newly married to Carl, an IT geek who looked a bit like Jeff Goldblum - tall, gangly and a little..., unimpressive. He was obsessive over Dee who was sex on legs, a real stunner, who turned heads wherever she went. In fact, she was a dental nurse but also a part-time lingerie model. I genuinely have no idea how they ended up together. It was difficult to imagine a more unlikely pair but they seemed happy.Dee and Carl were keen hikers and invited us to join them on the Whitsun bank holiday weekend for a few days hiking on the Cornish coastal path. Perhaps it was what Amanda and I needed to get our relationship back on track.It didn't start well though. The Friday afternoon was unusually hot for late May and we only discovered, whilst sitting in my non-airconditioned old Ford. First thing the guy knows, he has to give in and drop to the ground.Well, with all that there sports playin' Old Charley can work up quite a sweat. Now, all the guys in school like Old Charley 'cause he's a good sport. But, they get real downright bothered about having to sit in the same classroom all afternoon with Old Charley who is beginning to smell like a bull elephant in heat. So they start pesterin' Old Charley 'cause he don't take showers like the rest of them.Then one of them gets the idea that Old Charley don't take showers 'cause he ain't got no pecker. Now, I know that's a bunch of shit! Old Charley, he got a pecker that's out of this world. His pecker is bigger soft than mine is hard.Don't you know it ain't polite to interrupt me like that when I'm tryin' to tell you about Old Charley? How do I know how big Old Charley's pecker is? Well, I'll tell ya.One day, a while back, my old lady and old man were havin' a real knock down, drag out fight. I got sick of lissenin' to.
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