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She continues her berating, and the pitch of her voice swells into a shrewish falsetto.“Why don’t you play soccer? Soccer guys are hot.”Since she’s in a chatty, inquisitive mood, I figure two could play at that game, and I decide to hit the cunt with the Socratic Method.“Didn’t you play soccer in high school?” I ask, in a calm, Sam Harris-ish monotone.“I did, yeah,” she replies, her tone softening and stance slacking, her shoulders slouching.“Is that why you’re hot?” I blurt out, realizing that for the first time, I’d called my sister “hot” to her face.“So you think I’m hot? Well, I know you must. That’s why you were looking down my shirt!!” she retorts, accusingly, the portals of her eyes bulging as if they were dots under exclamation points.She snickers, and my face blushes scarlet red; now I’m on guard again, and I stammer, “I, yes, I, couldn’t look away. I’m sorry.”“Don’t be sorry. You’re juss a guy.”I notice her voice is slurry.“You been drinking, Sandy?” I ask, angle my head and. We were talking about sleeping arrangements, remember?”“Yup. It is one of the logistical things I am worried about.”“Well worry no more. Open your eyes.”I opened my eyes and let out a gasp. There, before my eyes sat the biggest bed I have ever seen. It had to be, no it WAS two California king mattresses side by side. The bed was huge.“Now as one of the partners in this trio, I made a unilateral decision. I know that we talked about having separate rooms so we could have some privacy, but we are married; and there will be no sleeping in separate beds when we are under this roof. I hope this does not make you upset, but I will not sleep in a bed without my wife AND my husband.”“Oh sweetie. I love it.”“Paul?”“That solves the “who do I sleep with” problem!”“That is right. You were worried about the logistics of who would sleep where with whom. The only issue that will pop up here is who gets to sleep next to whom. We can spread out or we can cuddle and I figure that it is big enough for.
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