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God made me beautiful so you would be attracted to me. God made me stupid so I would be attracted to you."That got a loud laugh and some foot stomping applause from most of the women in the audience and she continued on. The next one must have been for Bobby Denton because everyone knew about his penchant for blond jokes."A mathematician, a philosopher and a blond go to Hell and receive a challenge from the Devil. If they can stump him they can go to Heaven instead of being roasted by the fires in Hell. The philosopher goes first and asks the Devil a very hard question. The Devil smiled and said, "That the best you got?" and then rattled off the answer. The mathematician went next and the Devil instantly gave the answer. When it was the blonds' turn she took a chair and bored three holes in the seat. She sat down on the chair and she farted. Then she looked at the Devil and said:"Now tell me which hole the fart came out of." That's easy. It came out all three of them."The blond. She is onto me. I know this so she knows this. ‘Yes,’ I simply say. This is where she’d laugh if she could. She can’t get used to my foolishness, that is what super intelligence gets you- it fucks up your empathy. ‘Oh, Alex, you should have know that it wouldn’t work. That isn’t what I invented it for. Why didn’t you talk to me? I could have prevented you from wasting your time.’ ‘Why don’t you make a device that will help me contact humans? I know why: you are trying to keep me here!’ I shout at her. There is no real reason to shout. It doesn’t help things. ‘That isn’t true. You know that isn’t true, Alex. You need me far more than I need you.’ ‘Oh yeah?’ I challenge. ‘Yes. I don’t feel loneliness, friendship or love so I don’t need anyone around me.’ ‘I forgot. You don’t feel: period.’ ‘That is right, Alex, I don’t feel. I wasn’t made to. I’m a robot, robots don’t feel.’ She stops me before I can respond. ‘Don’t say that, Alex, remember you can’t hurt me. Now I’m off back to work..
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