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Me not thinking of her as a nasty bitch didn’t mean that she wasn’t a nasty bitch, a complete and total bitch. Then again, maybe she was a total bitch because I expected her to be a total bitch, and treated her like she was a total bitch. Well, I needed to get my head out of the clouds, because I have a project paper due tomorrow, and thinking about Sharon isn’t going to get it done! Wednesday morning: Ughhh! I managed to knock out that paper last night, but it sure wasn’t easy: it took me until 1:30 AM, partly because I kept day-dreaming about a girl who hates my guts. That’s somewhere between stupid and insane. And there she was, at the table with everybody else, when I got to the coffee ship. I had made a resolution to myself to treat Sharon pleasantly so that, if she was bitchy toward me, it wouldn’t be because I had been an ass to her. I had also drawn a little map, showing where my apartment was. I didn’t have anything ready for this evening, but I thought I just might ask her. "I stared at him in admiration. Anyone who considers two hundred grand a modest sum is entitled to that. "Okay," I said. "I think that's all I need for now. I'll take your case, Mr. Dashiell." God Bless You!" he cried, falling to his knees before me and salaaming me madly."I get a hundred bucks a day, plus expenses."He stopped salaaming me and got back into his chair. "I suppose you'll want a retainer?" he said, taking out his checkbook and a pen."It's customary," I replied."I suppose two hundred will be sufficient?" he asked, preparing to write."No," I said. "FIVE hundred will be sufficient. For now." That's ridiculous!" he protested. "Much too much." Fine," I said, rising from my chair and sashaying over to the door. "Give my regards to your wife," I said. as I held it open for him."Five hundred," he said, writing hurriedly.I gave the check the once-over as I took it from his trembling hand and laid it on my desk. "That's fine," I said. "I'll be in touch."As soon as this Dashiell.
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