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“I’ve got it.”“What, really? You do?”“Yeah, it... uhm. It came out when I—““Came.”“... Yeah.”“Well. Great! That’s great, Eric. I’m glad. Good job! Whew!”“I didn’t actually do much, I think...”“Doesn’t matter. You did it. I hope you’re not sore or anything. If you are, you can put some ice on it, and use normal pain relievers. If there are lasting problems, you should see a doctor-““No, I think it’s all good, actually. All fine. Uhm. The thing, the, uh, toy is not actually that big at all.”“Yeah, well. It’s not the size that counts.” A laugh. “So my wife was right all along. Figures.” Pause. “Thank you, Jason. Seriously. This was rather embarrassing, but it could have been so much worse. You—Just... Thank you.”“You are very welcome, sir.”“Is there anything I can do for you? Like, do you guys have customer support evaluation or anything like that, where I can give you specifically two thumbs up and commend you for your exceptional service or something? Get you that promotion? Because I. Rowell collared me before I could join the hounds and fox under the tent."Wanda tells me you've been taking her to the theater," Mrs. Rowell began."Yes ma'am. We've seen some of the productions the drama group puts on. We've also seen a few movies." Oh, she hasn't said anything about seeing movies," Mrs. Rowell commented sadly, like she had been cheated out of hearing Wanda describe the movies we had attended. At least that was what I was thinking she had missed hearing. I didn't think Wanda would tell her mother that I had stuck my middle finger in her wet pussy just as Lauren Bacall said, 'You know how to whistle, don't you?' and the theater erupted in a chorus of whistles."I hope you'll be gentle with my daughter. Please don't force her to do anything she doesn't want to do," Mrs. Rowell said, interrupting my recollection of seeing To Have and Have Not with her bare-assed daughter.What a strange thing for a mother to say to a college freshman. What did she take me for?"I'm always.
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