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The thought of making you mine was constantly in my thoughts. I finally came to you and told you what I wanted. Told you I wanted to ravage you, but you laughed in my face. “I will never do that. I am not like these other weak willed men and women that allow another to use them for their own pleasure, to do these unspeakable things that you want. I am no one’s slave and I never will be.” You sent me off with a look of disdain that only made me more determined to have you. And to show you that in submission, you are the one with the power. That it is the person who gives themselves fully to the other that is truly in charge. How to do this became an ever invasive thought in the back of my mind. But even if that would never happen, I still want you. I set about becoming your friend, never mentioning my desires again. We soon become lovers, enjoying each other more and more as time goes by. I watch you as others continue to try and dominate you, and watch as you knock them down, one by. .. We can help." We WANT to help," Nicole says, giving me a tight hug as she, Megan andI climb onto the backseat of Laura's mother's car."Hi girls," Mrs. White says. "Hello, Ashley! Long time no see! Are youdancing in the advanced class now?" Umm... Not quite," I grimace. "It's kinda a long story..."After the drive- during which I catch Laura's mother up on events andreceive, as Laura promised, her unconditional support if I want to comeout again- I arrive home feeling refreshed, as though a weight has beenlifted from my shoulders.One of the things that hurt the most about the disaster that was myfirst coming out was the way I ostracised myself from the girls, whoare easily some of the best friends I've ever had. If I'd only tried toexplain myself to them rather than pushed them away in anger, Iwouldn't have spent the last three months feeling miserable- anotherthing for which I can thank the testosterone poisoning my body. Knowingthat I can talk to the girls whenever I want is a.
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