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He hadentered the contest on a lark, never expecting to actually win. Butnaturally, there was a catch.The winner, in order to claim their prize, had to spend a single nightliving in the mansion. Predictable, but James didn't believe in thesupernatural, so with a sleeping bag and a night's supply of food andwater in tow, James made his way through the front doors."One night here? This'll be easy..." James remarked to himself.Sure, the mansion was falling apart, but he was a fairly adeptcraftsman, even at the age of 18, so he figured he could handle it.After all, who didn't want a fixer-upper?James looked around the first floor, checking the structural integrityof the floorboards, checking doors and windows, but all the while hecouldn't shake a vague feeling that he was being watched. Unknown tohim, hovering over James was the spectral form of a teenage girl.Leighton Vanderport was once the heiress to a vast industrial fortune,but now she was simply an un-departed spirit, still. There is no i = Sqrt(-1). =) (‘i’ is only in the language as a number.) Toy Euler: This is statistics? Faustus Mortal: The normal distribution. SQRT(2*PI())*NORMSDIST(PI()) Toy Euler: So? This doesn’t mean a thing to me. Is this more sorcery and numerology? Faustus Mortal: Transcendental numerology! Toy Euler: ‘Transcendental’ has to do with teeth and the dentist? Faustus Mortal: No, pi and e. Toy Euler: Well, this seems so trivial and abstract to me. Faustus Mortal: It is important to scientists. Toy Euler: I enjoy being a gynoid. Faustus Mortal: Huh? Toy Euler: Humans are so illogical. They seem drawn to sexual encounters that they try to avoid. Then they repent and do penance. Faustus Mortal nods. Toy Euler: And the whole ‘rape’ scenario to a sentient gynoid is odd. Toy Euler: It is more like ‘theft of services’ to me. Faustus Mortal: I have my vows. Toy Euler: Oh yes, I almost forgot, you are a celibate cenobite, one of those monks or priests. Faustus Mortal nods..
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