As Jill’s hazel eyes bored into my soul, I knew I couldn’t lie or obfuscate with her. I’d been lucky enough to win the heart of this smart and beautiful woman. These last twenty-three years we’d built a life together. Made love and raised a family. And now I knew that I had to admit to something that had been building a head of steam these last few weeks.I took a deep breath and admitted to something that I myself was only just beginning to piece together.“Ever since the pool-party, I’ve been wondering what it would be like to see you going with another guy.”That was as much as I could squeeze out from my confused and searching brain, fighting with my masculinity.Jill didn’t say anything, but her eyes spoke volumes as she gently encouraged me to share more. To go beyond the first layer peeled, to layer two and three and four. As far as was needed until I’d got to the heart of the matter.“Seeing you there with Craig, Byron, and Callan, it made me wonder if I gave you your freedom,. “I just called for a pizza, Kat – so I’m good – what about you, miss know-it-all?” she grinned, knowing damn well if she can’t smell my dinner cooking, she’s spot on. Laughing, I let her know she’s got me, and add that pizza sounds like the perfect solution to my problems. We both fall quiet for a bit, nursing our drinks and watching the night envelop our complex. I see her leave to answer her door – must be the pizza, I guess, pouring myself another glass and nibbling on a wedge of cheese. As Coltrane pours his heart into his version of “My Favorite Things” I hear a knock on the door. I open it to find Alison, a six pack of beer and a heavenly smell emanating from the big box she’s carrying in front of her. “Problem solved, neighbor” she says, “care to share your view with me for a slice or two?” I usher her in with a smile and we make ourselves comfortable, exchanging small talk about the week and other neighbors – a very pleasant surprise for me. After an hour or so, we’ve begun.
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