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While hewould have loved to have been in front of the stands in the green andwhite uniform with the dragon patch that his school's cheerleaders wore,he was smart enough to know that it was impossible and that even withhis Ranger skills, he couldn't defeat a gang of four or more boysdetermined to take him out. So he just dreamed and practiced with hisgroup of girlfriends in private.Thanksgiving for him and his mother was a small affair. Carolyn made asmall turkey with trimmings-stuffing, green bean casserole, yams,cranberry sauce, gravy and mashed potatoes. Pumpkin and mince pie fordessert topped with whipped cream. They usually had leftovers for a fewdays afterwards so sandwiches, turkey soup and turkey salad for lunchwas always on the menu. Usually Carolyn did it by herself, since sheloved to cook, but this year she got a surprise. Her son, wearing askirt, talked to her a few days before the holiday."Mom, I want to help this year. It's something daughters help theirmoms. Everything will be fine. Just keep them calm."Soon they could hear the siren as the ambulance was coming down the road.The EMTs and the doctor had their suitcases, syringes, and a stomach pump.One by one, they took each person into the bathroom, gave them an enema, and pumped out their stomach.The scene was not pretty.After the last one was finished, the doctor came out and said, "I think everything will be fine now," and he left.They were all looking pretty weak sitting around the living room and about this time the helper lady came in and whispered to Jean; "You know, the guy who run over Ol' Spot never even stopped."This one is compliments of DriDocA first-grade teacher, Ms. Brooks, was having trouble with one of her students. The teacher asked, "Harry, what's your problem?"Harry answered, "I'm too smart for the 1st grade. My sister is in the 3rd grade and I'm smarter than she is! I think I should be in the 3rd grade too!"Ms. Brooks had enough. She took Harry to the principal's.
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