He then hunches his shoulders forward and in a classic striptease move lets his braces fall down from his shoulders to dangle by his hips over his corduroy trousers. Grabbing both sides of his check shirt he rips it apart to reveal his tea stained vest underneath and with a final flourish he hurls his flat cap on to a pile of hay. “What the heck are you doing Mick?” says Paddy. “Jeez Paddy, ye frightened the livin bejasus out of me”, says an obviously embarrassed Mick, “but me and the Missus been having some trouble lately in the bedroom department, and the Therapist suggested I do something sexy to a tractor.I took a bird back to mine for sex last night. After some complaints for the first five minutes like,”Stop, you’re too big!” And,”Please No, you’re really hurting me now!” The fat cow eventually rolled off me and let me go on top.As I staggered into the living room and sat down on the sofa, my wife looked at me and said, “Can you not just go out and have a couple of fucking. “No what,” Claire asks confused.“No I am going to go visit our friend and I am going to tell her husband the truth about what happened,” I state and watch Claire’s face sour.“You can’t,” she pleads and I nod my head.“Actually yes I can, the word you’re looking for is probably shouldn’t or should not,” I tell her and she give me the ‘woman grumpy’ look.“Well you know what I mean. Meredith is a good woman and a good mother,” she says and I cut her off.“Just like you and she swore she’d keep her word and she signed just like you. So what does that say about good people, that it’s okay they break the rules because they’re helping someone else,” I ask and she starts in for her argument.“Yes, breaking rules to help someone can be forgiven,” Claire states and I chuckle.“If that were true then why have rules. Ones that are there to protect people and help them feel safe,” I counter and she’s picking up on what I’m doing.“You can’t throw a generalization at me with this. Hurting Meredith.
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