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There goes the chances of him not waking the k**s up.” I whispered to myself.While I lay on the bed waiting for his drunken ass to make its way down the hall I continued with my prayers. But this time not just for safety but for our futures. I prayed for my son Luke, I prayed that he could grow up into the man that I knew he could be. That he wouldn't be this scrawny timid 17 year old that flinched when someone approached him. I prayed for him to grow up and find a loving wife and have c***dren of his own who thought him their hero. I said a quick prayer for my 16 year old daughter Annie. I prayed for her to come out of her shell and talk to people, for her to be social like other teenagers. As I heard my husband’s footsteps coming closer I said a final prayer for myself knowing that it was useless because God must have forsaken me years ago for this to be my life now. But tonight instead of asking for protection like I always did I asked for something different I asked for it. .." Miriam began carefully."Oh, there's trouble, all right," Bernice replied. "He tried to explain it to me. He says that when you guys got together, he did some things and said some things that were -- I dunno -- a game? An experiment? Anyway, for him, it was something he could do at the time -- but he can't keep it up. But from what he says, you're going to want it or need it all the time..." Oh." Miriam sat staring at the floor, the phone to her ear."He feels bad. He said things seemed perfect -- but then he realized that some stuff that is extreme for him isn't for you..." Bernice paused. "Do you like, you know, being told to do stuff? You know -- stuff that's a little out there?" Yes," Miriam replied tonelessly.Bernice sighed. "I do stuff -- but I don't know that I like it. I just do what I'm told. That's ... bad enough..." It's like taking a dare," Miriam explained. "Kind of a feeling of accomplishment." Oh. I get it," Bernice replied. "But that's not how I feel about it.".
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