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Sharpie McEyebrows – This coffee date was absolutely no fun at all. She kept a constipated expression on her face the entire twenty minutes we met. Her makeup was just well ... disturbing. I suggested that she quit being a killjoy and instead she should go pluck her eyebrows into even further oblivion.I then discovered to my horror that she had received 'permanent makeup'. In fact, her eyebrows had been permanently laser removed and replaced with a less than realistic tattoo. Same also for her overly bright eyeliner, cheek blush and lipstick.Shudder.86. Ms. Social Butterfly #2 – I wondered if she had ever met the other Social Butterfly, if so they were undoubtedly hated rivals. She also ran a complete nightly schedule of appointments scheduled often weeks in advance, but with future planned dates. Apparently, she couldn't ever tolerate being alone by herself for even a moment.I quickly decided that the further away I kept myself from her, the better. She was showing unhealthy. Spending enough time doing my make-up and hair to show that I cared,without overdoing it to the point where I would have been considered atry hard.And it had worked. The picture looking back at me was overwhelming, thehint of ivory-white teeth peeked through the slightly parted-lips smile.The girl in the photo radiated confidence, as if she were about todeliver the punchline of a joke, one she knew was going to be a hit. Hereyes seemed to be staring deeply into the camera, burrowing into theoptical nerve of anyone lucky enough to look upon her portrait.I wanted to be angry, I wanted to hate myself and this stupid body, andwhatever had put me in this situation, but looking at the identificationcard left me feeling warm and tingly in a way that had been completelyforeign to me until this morning.So instead, I sat on the bed and moped about the nature of my existence.When I'd had enough of feeling sorry for myself, I pulled my golden hairinto a ponytail - something so simple not even I.
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