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I found them," I said."Found them, where?" I don't know."She just looked at me."On the floor," I added. "Uh... behind the washing machine?" Don't lie to me, Paul Jacob Johnson! You're only making it worse."Shit, she used all three of my names."I... found them in your bedroom..." I tried to leave room for doubt."How did you open the drawer?"She knew! How did she know?"I... uh... Dad left his keys on the dining room table," I said lamely."And so you go rooting around in our drawers, did you ever think thatmaybe it was locked for a reason?" Yes," I mumbled."What do you have to say for yourself, Paul Jacob?" I'm sorry, Mom." That's not enough. I think I'm going to have to discuss your punishmentwith your father." NO!" I shouted, reaching out impulsively. I couldn't imagine anythingworse than Dad knowing I had stolen a pair of his wife's panties. He wasthe man I most respected in the world! "Please, anything but that!"She looked at me for a while."Okay, fine." She got up and fetch a. Though the little white haired widow was approaching 65 years of age, she took her responsibilities very seriously.She distributed crime statistics, and police recommended countermeasures, in a monthly e-mail that her grandson had set up for her. She maintained a network of volunteers that touched base with the neighborhood's single senior citizens at least once a week, and more frequently if they were in failing health.She also baked delicious chocolate chip cookies for the quarterly meetings of the watch chapter, held at the local grade school. A large box of cookies was always given to the police department representative at the meetings, to help ensure that her neighborhood got the attention it deserved from the cops.To Muriel's great irritation, though her mind was sharp and her eyesight was still pretty good, the hearing in her left ear was only half as strong as it once was. Nothing pissed her off more than people assuming she must be weak-minded when they spoke into her bad.
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